Finality

Yesterday, I was perusing fanfiction.net (something I am prone to doing) and looked up a particular story. I won't bother giving pertinent details about the story, because...well, I'll get to that in a little bit. One thing that bugged my about the story was the ending; at the time there was only one chapter and the author had put a note at the end of the chapter that several matters would be brought up/discussed/explained in the following chapter. Except there wasn't any following chapter, and there hadn't been any following chapter for nearly a year-and-a-half now!

Then, very early this morning, I went back to the story, only to find it was no longer there. I was able to find the author's profile, and at the bottom of that was a notice stating that the author would be deleting several of their stories that they no longer had any inspiration for.

I was...saddened by this. What was written had been well written, and left me curious for more - I wanted to know what happened next. And at the same time, I felt (and still feel) somewhat relieved to have seen that. I have been given some certainty about the story (there aren't going to be any further chapters), and because it was deleted, I am no longer able to go back and reflect on what could have been, but will never. And because the lone chapter is gone, it cannot offer me false hope of a chapter to come.

Before I went looking for the story the second time (the time I found it to be missing), I had just watched "The Dark Knight Rises". In it, Bane has a short speech on why the pit prison is so awful: hope. If you really want to get out, just climb out. No one will stop you. Many of your fellow prisoners will watch and cheer you on. It sounds so easy in theory, but in practice, it is so very difficult. Many have tried to climb out. Some have died. All have failed. Except...the child of the story, of  the legend, the child born of the daughter of a warlord, the sole successful escapist.

I was able to relate the movie more, afterward. I had been offered the empty promise of a chapter to come that never would. With the deletion of the story, I would no longer be subjected to false hope. Knowing this, I have entered into a state of acceptance. I can now move on with my life.