The Leftover Event Horizon

Last night, my dad made macaroni and cheese for supper. While I have no grudge against my father or his cooking, even the thought of macaroni and cheese makes me cringe inside. Many emotions we have about things are based on memories and experiences. I cringe because I still remember the last batch of macaroni and cheese, and how that turned out.

Long story short, some of the leftover macaroni and cheese sat in the fridge for something like two weeks before someone finally ate it or threw it out (probably threw it out).

It occurs to me that this kind of thing happens kind of frequently: Food is prepared. Some of it is eaten; what isn't eaten is put into cold storage. After that, it is either eaten or not eaten. There is a strong chance, bordering on likelihood, that any particular item of food will be passed over at least once. Usually, this is because the chooser is interested in something else, possibly something that's been in the fridge for a longer time and may soon spoil, or for a shorter time and is more appealing in terms of relative freshness.

This brings me to my theory, that of The Leftover Event Horizon: if a piece of leftover food is not consumed within a certain timeframe, it will never be consumed.

There are various reasons why food passes The Leftover Event Horizon. As mentioned earlier, it may be passed over in favor of other food items. With food being added and removed from a fridge on a daily basis, it is very likely that some items are being moved around; either to make room for new food or to grant easier access to older food. With such a shuffle going on, it is not uncommon for some items of food to be pushed towards the back, out of sight and out of mind.

Once the item of food has passed beyond The Leftover Event Horizon, it will not be eaten. The exact time to reach this point varies by what kind of food, though the end result is the same. Beyond then, the item goes into a decline: visually unappealing, a probable decline of taste, an equally probable decline in texture. And after that, as "Weird Al" Yankovic sang in the song "Foil", there is "fungal rot, bacterial formation, microbes, enzymes, mold, and oxidation". At this point, eating that particular piece of food would not only be an unpleasant experience, it would be legitimately hazardous to your health.

And so it is thrown out.